Ready or Not

There is a mechanism in my genetic makeup that causes me to love to be prepared. My dad fed this feature by teaching me to be a list maker. I lay out my clothes the night before work or church, another thing my dad taught me. I keep a little black bag in my purse that holds all kinds of remedies~ if you have a headache, a stomachache, an allergy attack, or a scrape, I'm your girl. Did your dress rip? I have a safety pin. Hangnail? Don't worry, I have fingernail clippers. In a way, I think the general murmuring of the world around us is be prepared. Build up your savings. Stockpile water, non-perishables, and canned goods. Learn self-defense. Attend classes, buy a how-to book, watch an instructional video. There is nothing we shouldn't be ready for.

But maybe that is not what God intended. Recently I've learned that there are things we cannot be prepared for (I imagine parenthood is one such event, but this post isn't about parenthood, I PROMISE). Events in our lives that no matter when they happen, we simply aren't ready for them. The instability brought about by such events is called change, and I don't love change. Change causes me to tell God ,"Things were great just they way they were~ and I wasn't ready for this! Can you please wait until I am ready?" The best way I know to accept change is to look at how God is working in my life. How all the events behind me have been a way of preparing me for this, right here, right now. How if I had known what was going to happen, I would have seen the signs all along the way. During these times, there is a four-word prayer circulating constantly in my head: Oh Lord, prepare me. Because no instructional video or self-help book will prepare me the way He can. There is no kit, no little black cosmetic bag that has the remedy. While the world is telling us, "Caution! Be prepared!", God is whispering, "Be still and know that I am God." There is only the trust that with God, we can do all things. We can hope, we can cry, we can grieve, we can have peace that passes understanding. God has been and will continue to be preparing us for this. He knew this was coming, and he knows how we are going to grow because of it. He is always at work in our lives, and knowing that is always such a relief.


"All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be." Psalms 139:16

"I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." Philippians 4:13

Summer Priorities

The past two summers I was knee-deep in grad school. Many things were pushed to the back-burner during grad school, but nothing suffered more than my reading list (well, and this blog). This glorious, post-grad-school summer, I wanted to read as much as possible. I am teaching an ACT prep course Monday-Thursday from eight to noon, but other than that, my summer is commitment-free. Therefore, I committed myself to one book a week. I started the week school got out, and I've stayed on track so far. Here are the books I've read so far:

Vanishing Acts (Jodi Picoult)
The Good Earth (Pearl Buck) (a re-read, it's a favorite)
Shelter Me (Juliette Fay)
The Opposite of Me (Sarah Pekkanen)
The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Society (Mary Ann Shaffer and Annie Barrows)
The Heart of the Matter (Emily Giffin)

I'm about to pick a book for this coming week. My to-read list is a mile long, so I've been having trouble selecting what to read next. Stay tuned for my decision!

Back

Tap tap.....

is this thing on?

It's time to brush the dust off this blog.

Stay tuned.

2010

I didn't make actual resolutions for 2010. I just made some decisions. I decided to give up sweets (with the exception of wedding cake). I decided to work out at least four times a week. I decided to cook more often and eat out less. And I decided to blog more.

The first three decisions have been somewhat easy so far. It's the last one that has been a challenge.

I'm working on it though.